journal

May 3, 2004 2:00AM

Lord I can't believe how they have tried to turn us against each
other. How they have tried to make my heart adverse to Yours. They
can sear shingles all over my back and chest, then give me valtrex
that produces chronic headaches, stomach pains, and a whirlwind of
dizziness and fatigue; Through all of this my heart will never turn
against Yours. They can fire me from my first big job and then expect
me to complain to the Lord of the Harvest, but my God owns cattle on
a thousand hills...so I won't turn against Him. God, I can be single
at the 4 peak years of my life and consequently feel ugly, lonely,
and dejected but I still won't turn my heart against Yours. Lord
people from the church can turn up their nose at me, and pin a label
on me yet I still won't turn my heart against Your church. Lord some
of the closest people to me have dug the knife deeper in my heart,
but I still won't turn my heart against your vision for humanity.

Lord I can be alone, diseased, sinful, rotten, rejected and bitter
but none of these compares to Us. You have been my shield in the day
of calamity, my helmet in the day of battle.

This world is an establishment and as such is swayed by the likes of
the majority. The majority of people in this world have tried to
destroy me, but where there was malice Your grace abounded all the
more. Lord I spit on this world. They can never and will never tear
our Love apart.

-Tony