* DEDICATED TO MY WIFE...WHOEVER SHE IS....:(
(Conversation already in progress)
Angel of God: .....you have to chill. Its not as easy as you think.
You are not normal, to put it nicely. You cant expect to approach a
random girl off the street and all things to end well if she isn't
the girl that you're meant for. Do you honestly think a random girl
would be able to understand and accept you? Look at all your poems,
do you think a normal girl would be able to digest the diverse
subject matter? Would a normal girl be able to love you as you are?
Tony: But it hurts. This always happens, you know it does.
Angel of God: You have to trust that in His Divine Plan, God will
bring you the right spouse. But you have to trust His timing. Don't
let the blackness of depression envelop you. You have to let it go.
Tony: Its hard, Angel its so hard. I'm, I'm tired of feeling like
this. I just want the pain to stop.
Angel of God: Tony, I've seen this happen to many people before.
Don't let self loathing be your undoing. Accept that God has someone
better for you and accept that relationships outside of the Trinity
are not and can not be the pinnacle of joy or peace.
Tony: I still have to write this poem, though. I have to channel this
negative energy somehow.
Angel of God: I've said all that I have been commissioned to say to
you.
[Angel Departs]
But when he saw the wind, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried out, saying, Lord, save me.
----The Cross of Christ pt 4–Jesus Walks on Water: Meghan, I Am Drowning--------------you were my confidence to swim, now the waves overwhelm me...Megan has a BOYFRIEND!/ The wind that rocked my boat ----------Matthew 14:29---- Meghan I am sinking-----
[GOD I CALL ON YOU TO TURN THIS BLACKNESS INTO DAY, THIS MOURNING INTO JOY.....TURN THIS MEGHAN INTO.......God I have to let this go......TURN THIS PAIN OF MEGHAN INTO A STILL SEA]
Megan, sweetheart...my everything
When you smiled at me
all the pain of life faded
the hoary waves of my romantic sea became a firm path
the wind of writhing monotony (and loneliness) became still
the rocking, and jostling of my boat (my fate) became still
silence all around us was the peace inside my heart
I looked into your eyes, Meghan
they were blue like two crystals that housed
my dreams
I stared at them like rare and precious jems
I figured (wrongly)
I could attain them, and look at them for the rest of my life
I wanted to slowly, delicately run my fingers through your blonde hair
You
reached your hand out to me
when you smiled
You said you would go to lunch with me
so I tossed my fear deep
to the floor of eternity, the bottom of the seabed
Courage arose
out of its slumber inside of me
Courage arose
out of its slumber inside of me
and I walked
at first with my hands cupped over my face
then intrepidly
I began to precipitate my haste and run
I wanted to leap into your arms
because inside of you
I found the fear from drowning but
Suddenly without warning
you have withdrawn your hand
retreated from my romantic advance
out of your lips proceed the words
"my boyfriend"
like a dagger to the heart or a anchor attached to my ankles
suddenly without warning I begin to sink
the wind stirs
the boat rocks and drifts further and further away
the water begins to fill my lungs
and the waves crash over my head.....
And now,
Meghan I cant breathe. I feel fear creeping upon me like
a monster of the deep blue
As I drown in pity and remorse, Meghan, know
that I would have loved you
(If you had given me the chance)
-------------------------------------------
Matthew 14:29- 30
And he said, Come. And Peter went down from the boat, and walked upon
he waters to come to Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried out, saying, Lord, save me.
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