I blew it with God (Jeremiah 15:6)

When You died, (God)
The sky died too [Mark 15:33]
the world and my heart
suddenly enshrouded in the thickest black.
My eyes fail me but my memory is clear
Dysmas stretching his right arm, reaching for Your Face
tears drenching his cheeks
in all his agony he smiled ( a circumstance I will never forget)
before I could call out for Paradise
Your head dropped and arms fell limp
Terror enveloped the expressions of the crowd below
Then
The sun vanished

I wish I could retract everything I said
I never meant to ridicule Your Purpose
Malign heaven by maligning Your Name
Delighting
While the Roman soldiers cast aspersions
They spit in Your Face
As You stood, They kicked You
Back on Your knees
Inwardly I chuckled when they whipped You with the cords
I would now use to rip my own flesh
In Your stead

If You only turned Your Face once more
And fortune let our eyes meet…
Undo the nails in my hands throbbing
Liberate my feet from the prison on a wood cross suffering
In the healing therapeutic rivers I would bathe
Lay prostrate in Your Presence
...I would have begged You
before it was too late
To take me with You too
To take me with You too



(before the sun abandoned us and the ground began to shudder in disbelief)

------------------------------------------------
*I am the other thief---[not dysmas]--- Luke 23:39----mocking Him
with my last breath


DOES THE CROSS HAVE ITS LIMITS? DOES HIS BLOOD FLOWING DOWN WORMWOOD
STOP BEFORE IT REACHES YOUR HANDS? (as you watch Him die)

DO YOU LIVE FOR CHRIST OR NOT MAN?

* dedicated to my life of sin....my life on the edge....my life
without God guiding me; Him as my focal point mocking Him….my life
without my lover…the wife Ive been praying for....my life at the
judgment seat of Christ...condemned to Hell….on Sunday July 22, 2007
could I have changed it all?.....could I have turned back (to Jesus?)....before it was too late

You have rejected me," declares the LORD.
"You keep on backsliding.
So I will lay hands on you and destroy you;
I can no longer show compassion. (Jeremiah 15:6)

I will winnow them with a winnowing fork
at the city gates of the land.
I will bring bereavement and destruction on my people,
for they have not changed their ways. (Jeremiah 15:7)

---------[Don't let me die in my sins God]---
While it is still day, we must do the work of the One who sent me.
Night is coming. Then no one can work....WHEN HE CAN NO LONGER SHOW
COMPASSION
----[If I do, tell Lisa I love her...with all my heart]-[God I love
that girl!!!!!]------


I will make their widows more numerous
than the sand of the sea.
At midday I will bring a destroyer
against the mothers of their young men;
suddenly I will bring down on them
anguish and terror. (Jeremiah 15:8)