Better Tomorrows

*dedicated to me, the poor widow. I wish things would get better for me in matters of the heart :(

(and anyone else reading in the same situation or facing divers hardships)

----------------------/Better Tomorrows; The Thoughts Of The Widow with the Two Copper Coins

My deceased dreams to which I was once betrothed

left my life mired in desolation societal disregard

the paths of invisibility the jealous envious sister of pity

I tread, in the downpour of misfortune I slog

my vocation, begging of copper coins

of attention

of restoration of the lover I once had no progeny

at night I lean against the synagogue walls

to harmonize and intersperse sobbing with bitter humming

a piteous cry soul piercing so emotive it sedates the wild beasts

that would otherwise encircle those abandoned to die

tears so deep my cheeks have scars

sweating is my soul’s blood it solicits a tourniquet imploring

(despite in winter wrapped in tattered rags)

a reprieve, a commerce

not earned through Roman sentinels hacking innocent flesh

listening to the sacred Torah for cues

traveling to Jerusalem for Passover for echoes of life’s sympathy

a sermon for my soul to issue a summons

not to barter with death to spare this life, a proposition

long since indifferently given to fatalism

but to bargain with fortune for a better lot for hope against all odds

no more hauntings by ghosts of dissipation

futilely I feigned, but optimism is for me a lost capacity

a memory buried in the grave of regret

prayer with solemnities  

my soul’s worth two coins the price of all the dignity I have left

dropped into the treasury of God

fantasizing a better tomorrow

desperately

-----------------Mark 12:38-44

And in his teaching he said, "Beware of the scribes, who like to go about in long robes, and to have salutations in the market places and the best seats in the synagogues and the places of honor at feasts, who devour widows' houses and for a pretense make long prayers. They will receive the greater condemnation." And he sat down opposite the treasury, and watched the multitude putting money into the treasury. Many rich people put in large sums. And a poor widow came, and put in two copper coins, which make a penny. And he called his disciples to him, and said to them, "Truly, I say to you, this poor widow has put in more than all those who are contributing to the treasury. For they all contributed out of their abundance; but she out of her poverty has put in everything she had, her whole living.