Abimelech (Ann H, Will You Finally Date Me?)

* Whats with these curly haired girls dissing me? Sheesh!

--------------/A King's Aspiration - To Date Ann H

You have seventy reasons to commix together

as a heterogeneous whole me and all other bland

nameless faceless men, let us all rule

indistinguishable so you can date (or not) us indiscriminately, indifferent

detached

noncommittal at night I still feel unrecognized throbbing heart

anxious vacillating dreams morbid my missed opportunity

to be with you Ann

to be with you Ann

to be with you

I will journey for you

collude, with my cunning machinations, the people of Sichem

reinvent myself, muse wistfully at the archetypical man women want

I will rhetorically ask myself “does Ann want a dull man like the rest”

or one unique man to rule her heart?

(an alpha male with gusto, panache, confident swag)

and I will tease my desires with promises needy, vagabond men

I am of their bone and flesh, to me their lonely hearts inclined (single for so long)

kisses, married sex will be yours if you but slay

five dozen plus ten excuses she has used as grounds to overlook me,

reject me for lunch twice

seventy silver pieces of the temple of bitterness, Baalberith

a slaughterhouse a bloodbath in Ephra

dead – the second guessing sons of Jerobaal,

when I finally get the confidence to ask you out again, I will be King

(Please Ann, give me a chance this time)

-----------------/Judges 9:1-5

And Abimelech the son of Jerobaal went to Sichem to his mother's brethren and spoke to them, and to all the kindred of his mother's father, saying: Speak to all the men of Sichem: whether is better for you that seventy men all the sons of Jerobaal should rule over you, or that one man should rule over you? And withal consider that I am your bone, and your flesh. And his mother's brethren spoke of him to all the men of Sichem, all these words, and they inclined their hearts after Abimelech, saying: He is our brother: And they gave him seventy weight of silver out of the temple of Baalberith: wherewith he hired to himself men that were needy, and vagabonds, and they followed him. And he came to his father's house in Ephra, and slew his brethren the sons of Jerobaal, seventy men, upon one stone: and there remained only Joatham the youngest son of Jerobaal, who was hidden.