Sleep While Yearning

* To my future wife.....(maybe I'll meet you before this Saga ends?!)

[dedicated to this girl *, who I want badly - please dont run from me!]

I sleep, but my heart is awake; it is the voice of my beloved! He knocks, saying, "open for me, my sister, my love, my dove, my perfect one; for my head is covered with dew, my locks with the drops of the night." I have taken off my robe; how can I put it on again? I have washed my feet; how can I defile them? My beloved put his hand by the latch of the door, and my heart yearned for him. (Song of Solomon 5:2-4)

----------------------Song of Solomon Saga Chapter 5: Sleep While Yearning


Life is anguish
in the silence you leave behind in your wake
you are my perfect one
your face stains the walls, irreversibly
your voice reverberates in every room I occupy;
your memories have become family, the closest of kin
every night, at the hour my lovelorn pain is most acute
rain falls steadily into downpour
as I stare out the open windows. hoping for your return
-that the moon would illuminate your road home-
I am sad because I cant clasp your facial expressions tightly
an embrace
in my mind, or encapsulate your most recent laughter
for my daydreaming
I want you to get your hair wet for me: remove your distrust,
that hermetic, stoic, misanthropic robe
and wash your feet from the dusty paths of fear of commitment
because once you fall in love with me
you will never be able to defile them, or clothe yourself again
nakedness and vulnerability
I wish you would put your hand on the latch of my door
because you know I would never bar your entry
my ears would never spurn your words "open for me, my love"
I close my eyes as the shadows fall and think of you without cease
until the morning sun taps me and says you still aren't here
I never sleep
I need you by me
my heart yearns for you, always