My Death, With Dignity

-----------/My Death, With Dignity - First Station: Jesus is condemned to death (Jesus Thoughts As He Is Condemned to Die)

I close my eyes my soul stands on steps of injustice rendered and
before throngs. I think about my Mother, sisters and brothers left
back home
dismayed behind damaged, dolorous doors, dour. huddling, shivering dreadfully before whats left of a diminutive candle burning. Baptized
in the Jordan submerged in fears, a sea of critical expectation holding my breath eliciting concern of my drowning, paused for insecurity pondering
existence and purpose
arising drenched hair draping my forehead veiling my eyes my fingers part
I see the crowd "Let him be crucified" before Pilate incensed and crazed
I close my eyes again (to escape: the yelling pierces my ears)
the Spirit descends on me like a dove a voice thundering "your life is not
one lived in vain" Barabbas is not a man but a paradigm of the fallen
preferring wickedness to virtue into their bosom, the latter bound
and stripped beaten and mocked. As an adolescent of twelve flanked by Pharisees Sadducees (and the requisite general vagabond wanderer -
symbolic of the natural inquisitiveness of all souls) preaching repentance
posing the question of freedom, true and unadulterated met with
positive assertions of adherence to Mosaic Law, unbroken,
uncompromised...and I contest...but Pilate asks does this merit death silence and awe awaiting a verdict, then blaringly I hear my parents' voices in the raucous tumult "his blood be on us and our children.....where have you been Jesus, all this time we have sought after you"
confusion, apoplexy at things misunderstood . my heart races
yet it is my Father's business not the Law that begets Salvation
love opposed to duty
a path fraught with adversity, trial and testing
Golgotha, heaven's gatekeeper a crucifix mine attendant guiding my path
and everyone who comes after (the whole world)
and all these axioms were taught by John the Baptist but
before the masses I stand - a testament to a life purposefully and well lived


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Matthew 27:22-38
Pilate saith unto them, What shall I do then with Jesus which is called Christ? They all say unto him, Let him be crucified. And the governor said, Why, what evil hath he done? But they cried out the more, saying, Let him be crucified. When Pilate saw that he could prevail nothing, but that rather a tumult was made, he took water, and washed his hands before the multitude, saying, I am innocent of the blood of this just person: see ye to it. Then answered all the people, and said, His blood be on us, and on our children. Then released he Barabbas unto them: and when he had scourged Jesus, he delivered him to be crucified. Then the soldiers of the governor took Jesus into the common hall, and gathered unto him the whole band of soldiers. And they stripped him, and put on him a scarlet robe. And when they had platted a crown of thorns, they put it upon his head, and a reed in his right hand: and they bowed the knee before him, and mocked him, saying, Hail, King of the Jews! And they spit upon him, and took the reed, and smote him on the head. And after that they had mocked him, they took the robe off from him, and put his own raiment on him, and led him away to crucify him. And as they came out, they found a man of Cyrene, Simon by name: him they compelled to bear his cross. And when they were come unto a place called Golgotha, that is to say, a place of a skull, They gave him vinegar to drink mingled with gall: and when he had tasted thereof, he would not drink. And they crucified him, and parted his garments, casting lots: that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the prophet, They parted my garments among them, and upon my vesture did they cast lots. And sitting down they watched him there; And set up over his head his accusation written, THIS IS JESUS THE KING OF THE JEWS.