This aint Erin....but kinda looks like her!!!!!
Ahhhh....how do I give voice to these simmering latent emotions? In lieu of my heart being waylaid by years now, upon years of betrayal, loss, and rejection pertaining to relationships pursued and subsequently abandoned, I find consolation and balm in reminiscing about this girl named Erin I used to have a substantial fondness for. The thing is, she was always in a relationship, (owing, undoubtedly, to her stellar looks and demeanor) thus precluding me from making any earnest attempt at sending overtures her way. So lets see, eight to twelve (I am intentionally obfuscating any effort you can make to pinpoint her identity here) years later, I still pleasantly recall that rapture of sentiment she used to inspire in my soul. If, things were different, and we (or rather I) weren’t denied the opportunity to be together…I presume we would be rather happy at this juncture. But crap, since Im still single and nursing these recurring wounds of the ravages dating….this is a cause and call for melancholy. Erin…I wish this night to be dedicated to you and whatever sundry tasks, or errands you may be doing. I had only hoped I could be sharing this time with you, maybe pushing a shopping cart while you blithely buy bread and fruit or something.
-------------/King Zedekiah's Regret (Over Erin) – His/My Thoughts On Losing Judah
Pashur was my blind foolhardiness and Zephaniah my wayward naivete
Erin,
when I first saw you I desperately wanted a reprieve
from the formidable forces
of Babylonian romantic renunciation from my last girlfriend
(k*na)
and brief yet fruitless relations sought out (in class/on campus)
in the name of love hoping
for requital
your cerulean eyes, your hour glass figure your
demure ethos, feminine athleticism
was like a hoped for prophecy from Jeremiah's (fate) mouth disbanding
those malevolent
maddening
forces of forced and austere singleness trying to breach the
gates and towers of the fortress of my grand expectations for marriage
armed with weapons of overconfidence,
and assumption of the goodness
of my wisdom (and maybe too small a shield, aka shyness)
and I mused, with levity whenever I saw you at school figuring
perhaps the LORD will perform wonders for me as in times past
when I met alluring women (former loves) who enchanted me so blissfully
in my heart, my Judah
but this time, with you, the prophet’s words were not so favorable
and you
oblivious to me, you so sexy yet so not into me
you wrapped in another man’s arms before
I could raise my voice to you beyond a feeble muster of
"hey Erin....(you look so pretty today, you want to hang out sometime
and maybe soon be as smitten with me as I am with you)"
because he said to me:
"I am about to turn against you the weapons of war that are in your hands, which you are using to fight the king of Babylon and the Babylonians who are outside the wall besieging you. And I will gather them inside this city. I myself will fight against you with an outstretched hand and a mighty arm in furious anger and in great wrath"
hexing
any desires of mine for you that I held fast, predicting
they would die by the sword, famine or plague
of disappointment, of crying in my dorm room,
and melancholy
yet perhaps deservedly so…for truthfully in my haughtiness
I didn't meet your acquaintance formally,
I didn't ask you out for lunch,
I didn't inquire into your personal life and aspirations, and penchants.
or compliment your gorgeous smile
I stagnated
and lifelessly watched as other men more hawkish ruled the day
won your affections
and made me rue that day that I reckoned
"Who can come against me? and take Erin away?
Who can enter my refuge of affinity for her? she is mine rightfully"
I was punished as my deeds deserved
jilted in justice
and my sadness and bitterness over us not being together
will forever kindle a fire in the forests of my memories
of my late teens and early twenties
that still consumes everything around
weighs down on me
in everything I do
----------Jeremiah 21
The word came to Jeremiah from the LORD when King Zedekiah sent to him Pashhur son of Malkijah and the priest Zephaniah son of Maaseiah. They said: "Inquire now of the LORD for us because Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon is attacking us. Perhaps the LORD will perform wonders for us as in times past so that he will withdraw from us." But Jeremiah answered them, "Tell Zedekiah, This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: I am about to turn against you the weapons of war that are in your hands, which you are using to fight the king of Babylon and the Babylonians who are outside the wall besieging you. And I will gather them inside this city. I myself will fight against you with an outstretched hand and a mighty arm in furious anger and in great wrath. I will strike down those who live in this city—both man and beast—and they will die of a terrible plague. After that, declares the LORD, I will give Zedekiah king of Judah, his officials and the people in this city who survive the plague, sword and famine, into the hands of Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon and to their enemies who want to kill them. He will put them to the sword; he will show them no mercy or pity or compassion.’ "Furthermore, tell the people, 'This is what the LORD says: See, I am setting before you the way of life and the way of death. Whoever stays in this city will die by the sword, famine or plague. But whoever goes out and surrenders to the Babylonians who are besieging you will live; they will escape with their lives. I have determined to do this city harm and not good, declares the LORD. It will be given into the hands of the king of Babylon, and he will destroy it with fire.' "Moreover, say to the royal house of Judah, 'Hear the word of the LORD. This is what the LORD says to you, house of David:
"'Administer justice every morning;
rescue from the hand of the oppressor
the one who has been robbed,
or my wrath will break out and burn like fire
because of the evil you have done—
burn with no one to quench it.
I am against you, Jerusalem,
you who live above this valley
on the rocky plateau, declares the LORD—
you who say, "Who can come against us?
Who can enter our refuge?"
I will punish you as your deeds deserve,
declares the LORD.
I will kindle a fire in your forests
that will consume everything around you.;"
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