https://youtu.be/yQOBUrRaPU0
* Dedicated to J. D.
* Saint Michael pray for me
JD so many years have passed since I unveiled my heart to you in an email, and you, agog, ran away…..and never came back. The one who I was “absolutely crazy about” has nested with another man…and now a baby. #GODDAMNIT Well, I meant that metaphorically as you shall soon see, however I felt I must write to you/about you one last time….a funeral hymn….to what was destroyed in me after you rejected me. Goodbye. I will always….remember (and now appreciate) how the pain you inflicted, I guess, made me a better man, how the pangs forged a metalwork of forbearance. But gosh every time I see you, you still look so sexy to me! (Goodbye my forever non-love)
+------------------/The [Former] City of Our Love (Sodom and Gomorrah)
Back then,
common sense to me was
once a mob of degenerate,
lecherous men. It salivated when
it learned of my musing on us having sex,
(married)
flesh to flesh, chest pressed to big breasts,
as if your group lunch counterproposals
to my intimate dining suggestions,
your silence at that email wherein I poured my
soul out to you, started baying,
lustful and power-hungry cabal
grown impatient,
bashing against my hopes as if a door
that granted access to my heart.
But I obdurately refused,
instead offering the virgin daughters of
your imminent indication of the intensity
of your emotions towards me, and the
eventual warming of your heart towards
God through my influence as
sacrificial offerings. I was willing to embrace
a vitiated form of your love,
your indifference to religion rather than
accept the loss. Yet time,
two angels of Sodom with severe expressions,
flaming swords of soul-searching,
(reckoning the aforementioned crowd
of reason and rationality as degenerate scum),
grabbed me by the hand and yanked me
out of the city of the possibility of
our love, urging me to let go of delusions
and never look back, to move away
from the approaching condemnation.
You got married: fire,
and had a baby: brimstone,
it was like smoke in my eyes,
the smell of sulfur in my nose,
destruction raining from the sky,
as I cried inside stumbling towards Zoar.
But when I saw you recently sauntering
down the hall,
I looked back to that city in my mind
that no longer is, and never should have
been, even though I know I shouldn’t have.
Sodom was never going to be good for me,
and Gomorrah, a sweeping lie,
when I see your breasts bounce
and your green eyes sparkle it just kills me,
human turned salt pillar,
a rejected man filled with shameful
regret.
---------------------Genesis 19:17;23-26
And it came to pass, when they had brought them forth abroad, that he said, Escape for thy life; look not behind thee, neither stay thou in all the plain; escape to the mountain, lest thou be consumed….The sun was risen upon the earth when Lot entered into Zoar. Then the Lord rained upon Sodom and upon Gomorrah brimstone and fire from the Lord out of heaven; And he overthrew those cities, and all the plain, and all the inhabitants of the cities, and that which grew upon the ground. But his wife looked back from behind him, and she became a pillar of salt.
------Name Lyrics
And even though the moment passed me by
I still can't turn away
Cuz all the dreams you never thought you'd lose
Got tossed along the way
And letters that you never meant to send
Got lost or thrown away
And now we're grown up orphans
And never knew their names
We don't belong to no one
That's a shame
But you could hide beside me
Maybe for a while
And I won't tell no one your name
And I won't tell 'em your name
And scars are souvenirs you never lose
The past is never far
Did you lose yourself somewhere out there?
Did you get to be a star?
And don't it make you sad to know that life
Is more than who we are
We grew up way too fast
And now there's nothing to believe
And reruns all become our history
A tired song keeps playing on a tired radio
And I won't tell no one your name
And I won't tell 'em your name
I won't tell em' your name
Oooh, oooh, oooh
I won't tell em' your name
Ow!
I think about you all the time
But I don't need the same
It's lonely where you are
Come back down
And I won't tell 'em your name
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