Thursday, May 5, 2011

THINGS TO DO B4 U FALL N LUV.....PART 1





THE DEVIL AND GOD ARE RAGING INSIDE OF ME FOR YOU BABES

THINGS TO DO B4 U FALL N LUV.....PART 1 (give voice to and release angst)

Dedicated to Brand New: Degausser [The Devil And God Are Raging Inside Me] listen to this song and ROCK OUT before you read this post!!!
Video 1
Video 2

Dedicated to Meaghan, Jennifer and all the other babes I sacrificed my heart and my intentions to as a goodwill offering, only to have it denounced. Why did you have to have a baby and thus seal our fate as ill-fated lovers, and why did you have to run from religion and why did you have to date someone in the middle of my emotional descent (when I was falling for you)? Why do your eyes incite my heart to bouts of exhilaration and anxiety to this day, feelings that will now never be consummated? Why is that with you, I feel so free to be myself, when others evoke feelings of shame and insecurity? I promise you, you will have to make peace with the fact that you chose imprudently, and wed the wrong man.....your deep sighs beneath your covers will forever attest to this (and mine too) Why is it that you want me and I want you yet our love will never be, never.....never....be? WHY DID YOU INITIALLY PORTRAY YOURSELF AS A GOOD FIT FOR ME ONLY to morph into a lesser creature; one who I am unable to lay claim to. AND THE HE.....*ahem*....THE HECK WITH EVERYONE ELSE – THEY DON’T HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS ACRID LONGING IN THEIR SOULS FOR A GIRL WHO WANTS TO LOVE THEM BUT WONT, WHO HAS CHOSEN NOT TO. AND IT MAKES ME SICK THAT YOURE STILL SO SEXY.....Your legs are amazing….The stress of not having you is what gave me all this acne. Staring at your picture is a temporary stay of grief, but only reopens the wound frustrating the slow, listless healing process. Enough with this paragraph stuff – time to get to the emo-poetry!!!!


--------------------------/Tension, Regret

I came into my own country wincing
there you were, there I was
familiarity was our native language – you so down to earth
eliciting my comfort, repose in your radiance
(you cutie!)
completely smitten, it pained me to think you
weren’t the missing rib that completes me
so I wanted to perform miracles
to dazzle
woo you into my arms, your hair stroked between my
fingers
I wanted to split the Red Sea of your doubts, baby
raise those dead latent emotions of passion
for romance.....you never thought would walk out from
behind the stone
.....you should have let me cure the son of your doubts
that threw your optimism into fire and mirth into water
drowning
but there wasn't much I could do, was there?
You picked a boyfriend that wasn’t me, you chose a path that
diverted from mine. God only knows that smarted like nothing
else greatly
hampering my capability to really accomplish anything worthwhile except
menial tasks like making you smile
and light flirting that ultimately titillates the soul but can never
never
never
sate. And this was like curing a few that were sick, laying my hands upon them
but nothing on the scale of magnificence
now visiting you, and talking with you is quite laconic and vapid
like visiting my former teacher for a brief spell before heading back to work
and what sucks is acknowledging I could have pursued other girls with a
greater success rate
its ironic you know? That Im
not without honor, but in my own country, and in my own house
amongst girls that I let my guard down, and expose my vulnerabilities
you are so breath taking, I cant help but steal a quick glance
when you turn your head to talk to someone else
the man in me prevents me from shedding any tears but if I was a woman
I would bawl every night. Because despite the fact that you are my world
provoking my soul to bouts of emotional ecstasy
to you Im just a carpenter ( a friend)
son of Mary, the brother of James, and Joseph, and Jude, and Simon

--------------Mark 6:1-6
And going out from thence, he went into his own country; and his disciples followed him. And when the sabbath was come, he began to teach in the synagogue: and many hearing him were in admiration at his doctrine, saying: How came this man by all these things? and what wisdom is this that is given to him, and such mighty works as are wrought by his hands? Is not this the carpenter, the son of Mary, the brother of James, and Joseph, and Jude, and Simon? are not also his sisters here with us? And they were scandalized in regard of him. And Jesus said to them: A prophet is not without honor, but in his own country, and in his own house, and among his own kindred. And he could not do any miracles there, only that he cured a few that were sick, laying his hands upon them. And he wondered because of their unbelief, and he went through the villages round about teaching.


----Degausser lyrics
Goodbye to sleep,
I think this staying up is exactly what I need
Well take apart your head
Take apart the counting, and the flock it has bred

Goodbye to love,
Well it's a ride that'll push you up
Right against the wall
(Right against the wall)
Chew it up and swallow it

You're brought back but you're running
I'll find sleep in the end tonight
I can't shake this little feeling
I'll never get anything right

Goodbye you liar,
Well you sipped from the cup but you don't own up to anything
Then you think you will inspire
Take apart your head
(and I wish I could inspire)
Take apart the demon, in the attic to the left.

(goodbye my love)
You're brought back but you're running
(goodbye my love)
I'll find sleep in the end tonight
(goodbye my love)
I can't shake this little feeling
(goodbye my love)
I'll never say anything right

I'm on my own, never say anything right
I'm on my own, never say anything right
I'm on my own, never say anything right
I'm on my own, never say anything right

Well take me, take me back to your bed
I love you so much that it hurts my head
Say I don't mind you under my skin
I'll let the bad parts in, the bad parts in
When we were made we were set apart
Life is a test and I get bad marks
Now some saint got the job of writing down my sins
The storm is coming, the storm is coming in

You're brought back but you're running
I'll find sleep in the end tonight
I can't shake this little feeling
I'll never get anything right

I'm on my own, never say anything right
I'm on my own, never say anything right

Take me, take me back to your bed
I love you so much that it hurts my head
I don't mind you under my skin
I'll let the bad parts in, the bad parts in
Well you're my favourite bird and when you sing
I really do wish you'd wear my ring
No matter what they say, I am still the king
And now the storm is coming, the storm is coming in

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