Mark 10:38-40 ["You don't know what you are asking," Jesus said. "Can you drink the cup I drink or be baptized with the baptism I am baptized with?" "We can," they answered. Jesus said to them, "You will drink the cup I drink and be baptized with the baptism I am baptized with, but to sit at my right or left is not for me to grant. These places belong to those for whom they have been prepared."]
*dedicated to Dashboard Confessional, This Bitter Pill
* dedicated to Agent SS*
-------------------//"The Cup Of Your Love– I Will Die If It Tastes Bitter"
[I'll swill down this drink, pouring on my beard and neck
eyes closed]
In Love
I was your disciple – you led and I followed
you healed my body- from loneliness sunken
put your hands on my hunchback and I stood up straight
(I was just so happy to know you – you refreshed me)
my apothecary, you opened my eyes with mud and spittle
-a medley of your intellect and pragmatism and friendliness-
allowed me to see your beauty and gaze on
a real woman of substance with clarity
not the other girls – who looked like trees
blurry
And (I know) the risk inherent in my aspirations,
to love you with abandon, till your dying day,
is fraught with dangers.... the cup of your affections
could be a cup of poison discord
if my love isn't reciprocated
but I would rather die of thirst
yet to be spurned would be the most horrific of fates
baptized by fire of disconsolation and not water
rejected
blood wounds and not the wine of mirth
until my soul is left gored
and heart emaciated
crucified by Roman soldiers of contempt
Life is suffering without you – toxicity to my throat
I want to die without you – cauterize my lungs
liquid of vulnerability, weakness
I’ll ingest it, despite the maladies to come
just so long as we can be together
the cup of your love laced with your passion
is worth drinking
no matter what happens to me
(just dont abandon me)
(Agent SS**, don't do this to me – don't run from me. Don't make me drink this bitter cup of your rejection)
------------------This Bitter Pill lyrics -----
Walking away
It's not the same as running
Is it to you now
That you've run this in the ground
And you say, "Take this,
This medicine is just what you deserve.
Swallow, choke, and die."
And this bitter pill is leaving you with such an angry mouth
One that's void of all discretion, such an awful tearing sound
With it's measure only equalled by the power of my stare
Glaring over you and over you this feeling of despair is never wearing out
It's wearing off
And it's leaving you
With such a heavy heart
And a head to match
The bottle is waiting
The cap is twisted begging to be used
And so are you
And this bitter pill is leaving you with such an angry mouth
One that's void of all discretion, such an awful tearing sound
With it's measure only equalled by the power of my stare
Glaring over you and over you this feeling of despair is never wearing out
Wearing out
Wearing out
Wearing out
Wearing out
Wearing out
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