* dedicated to Meek Mill, Dreams and Nightmares
-----------------------/Aaron’s Diary [Part 1] – Aaron’s
Dreams and Nightmares – Thoughts While Moses Is Away
Scarab beetles pinch, jackals growl advancing towards me
howling
their eyes glow and mouths froth heralded by foul breath,
the stench of death
horrid, the proof of a rich heritage of biting.
They, projecting their thoughts of blood telepathically to
me
as emissaries announcing their intent;
a short distance behind them a crescendo builds: the war
horn of Egyptian soldiers in lockstep
determinedly follow as I start to hyperventilate yet my limp
limbs leaden
are so heavy I cant move, and my voice is so petrified it
goes mute…..I cant signal for help.
On the other side of consciousness my sweet Elisheb
cradling my convulsing body singing– the promises of Moses –
tender cadences of assurance that his return is imminent….
Glory has not forsaken me so I can return to sleeping.
Yet the people beyond my tent, and the tabernacle murmur
insurrection
(in my dreams, my nightmares and my waking)
the perilous insecurities of back scars, anger of rebels,
welts on chins from punches from tyrannical warlords, and
the shrill screams,
sickening, of babies in continuous squalor haunt them,
and I fear they are one more night from delirium and I one
moon removed
from suicide. We need a totem of hope
in the face of adversity to stand strong and resolute like a
bull made of gold,
to cultivate an honorable rapport with the nations flanking us rebuffing
our former oppressors’ rebukes of intimidation – that for
those daring enough to defect
there are only skeletons beyond the Red Sea.
As a boy I knew Yahweh not, my scabbed feet callous from
building pyramids in hot sand
forty days in his absence has supplanted the bellowing of
Pharaoh on opposite shores
exhilaration of impossible feats, the newness of our liberation;
trust in a new God
paranoia is replacing painful patience in the face of an
unruly mob of Hebrews…
questioning Moses… (and needing to be placated)
without faith and guidance and prayer and hope we all must return
Im sorry
to the foreign pagan gods we once knew
and may only ever know.
(maybe we were foolish to hope – obtuse to smile)
---------------------Exodus 32:1-6
And when the people saw that Moses delayed to come down out
of the mount, the people gathered themselves together unto Aaron, and said unto
him, Up, make us gods, which shall go before us; for as for this Moses, the man
that brought us up out of the land of Egypt, we wot not what is become of him. And
Aaron said unto them, Break off the golden earrings, which are in the ears of
your wives, of your sons, and of your daughters, and bring them unto me. And
all the people brake off the golden earrings which were in their ears, and
brought them unto Aaron. And he received them at their hand, and fashioned it
with a graving tool, after he had made it a molten calf: and they said, These
be thy gods, O Israel, which brought thee up out of the land of Egypt. And when
Aaron saw it, he built an altar before it; and Aaron made proclamation, and
said, To morrow is a feast to the Lord. And they rose up early on the morrow,
and offered burnt offerings, and brought peace offerings; and the people sat
down to eat and to drink, and rose up to play.
-----Dreams and Nightmares Lyrics
Ain't this what they've been waiting for?
You ready?
I used to pray for times like this, to rhyme like this
So I had to grind
like that to shine like this
In a matter of time I
spent on some locked up s*
In the back of the
paddy wagon, cuffs locked on wrists
See my dreams unfold,
nightmares come true
It was time to marry
the game and I said, "Yeah, I do"
If you want it you
gotta see it with a clear-eyed view
Got a shorty, she
tryna bless me like I said, "Achoo"
Like a nigga sneezed,
nigga please before them triggers squeeze
I'm gettin' cream,
never let them hoes get in between
Of what we started,
lil' nigga but I'm lionhearted
They love me when I was
stuck and they hated when I departed
I go and get it
regardless, draw it like I'm an artist
No crawling, went
straight to walkin' with foreign cars in my garage
Got foreign b* m*, f*',
suckin', and swallowin'
Anything for a
dollar, they tell me get 'em, I got 'em
I did it without an
album
I did s* with Mariah
Lil' nigga I'm on
fire
Icy as a hockey rink,
Philly nigga I'm Flyer
When I bought the
Rolls Royce they thought it was leased
Then I bought that
new Ferrari, hater rest in peace
Hater rest in peace,
rest in peace to the parking lot
Phantom so big, it
can't even fit in the parking spot
You ain't talkin'
bout my niggas then what you talkin' bout?
Gangstas move in
silence, nigga and I don't talk a lot
I don't say a word, I
don't say a word
Was on my grind and
now I got what I deserve f* nigga
Hold up wait a
minute, y'all thought I was finished?
When I bought that
Aston Martin y'all thought it was rented?
Flexin' on these
niggas, I'm like Popeye on his spinach
Double M, yeah that's
my team, Rozay the captain, I'm the lieutenant
I'm the type to count
a million cash then grind like I'm broke
That Lambo, my new b*,
she'll ride like my ghost
I'm ridin' around my
city with my hands strapped around my toast
Cause these niggas
want me dead and I gotta make it back home
Cause my momma need
that bill money and my son need some milk
These niggas tryna
take my life, they f* around get killed
You f* around, you f*
around, you f* around, get smoked
Cause these Philly
niggas I brought with me don't f* around, no joke
All I know is murder,
when it comes to me
I got young niggas
that's rollin' I got niggas throwin' b's
I done did the DOAs,
I done did the KODs
Every time I'm in
that b* I get to throwin' 30 G's
Now I'm hanging out
that drop head, I'm riding down on Collins
They let my nigga Ern
back home, that young nigga be wildin'
We young niggas and
we mobbin', like Batman and we're robbin' (Robin)
This 2-door Maybach,
with my seat all reclinin'
I'm like real nigga
what up, real nigga what up
If you ain't about
that murder game then p* nigga shut up
If you diss me in yo'
raps, I'll get your p* a* stuck up
When you touchdown in
my hood, no that tour life ain't good
Catch me down in MIA,
at that heat game on wood
With that Puma life
on my feet, like that little engine I could
Boy I slide down on
your block, bike on twelve o'clock
And they be throwing
deuces on the same nigga they watch
And I'm the king of
my city cause I'm still calling them shots
And these lames
talking that bulls* the same niggas that flock
I'm the same nigga
from Berks Street with them nappy braids that lock
The same nigga that
came up and I had to wait for my spot
And these niggas
hating on me, hoes waiting on me
Still on that hood s*,
my Rolls Royce on E
They gon' remember
me, I say remember me
So much money have ya
friends turn into enemies
And with these beef I
turn my enemies to memories
With them bricks they
go from 40 ain't no 10 a key, hold up
Broke nigga turn
rich, love the game like Mitch
And if I leave you
think them pretty hoes gon' still suck my d*?
It was something
'bout that Rollie when it first touched my wrist
Had me feeling like
that dope boy when he first touched that brick
I'm gone
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