image courtesy of thebricktestament.com
WOOOOOOO! IM EXCITED MEN AND WOMEN WOOO!!!! This Taylor
Swift Campaign has me all riled up and wired with jubilation! Im like Ray Lewis
out there on the field getting DOOOWWWNNNN!
Getting jiggy with it!
ITS GETTING HOT IN HEYA….WHOOOOO…SO TAKE OFF ALL
YOUR….*ahem!* excuse me, gents this a CHRISTIAN blog, afterall, naaahm
saying???
Anyways, I was not content when I woke up this morning!
Something was amiss! My #TaylorDateTony campaign needed a second jolt of
energy, just to ensure the kick-off
gins up enough enthusiasm, to at least secure a kiss on the
cheek from the inimitable, gracious, delightful Taylor! How ironic then, that I
call on my boy! Joab the shrewd to assist me
Joab (perturbed at his introduction): what you call me?
Tony: eehhhh, riiight. The “shrewd” part….my bad son! Don’t
stab me while grabbing my beard!
Joab (raising one eyebrow, standing up advancing towards
Tony): WHAT!!! WHY YOU LITTLE SON OF A…..!!!!
[Tony runs away, back to his audience, just barely escaping
Joab]
OOOOOOOKAAAAY! MY BAD
GUYS! This isn’t about me and that little rascal…oops! Shhhhh! Joab…Its about
me and Taylor! But hey Taylor, snookums! this is about us!
My second entry into the #TaylorDateTony campaign! Lets do
this! OH YEAH, AND GOOOOOOO RAVENS!!!! Now me personally, Im an RG3 fan, but
anyways…..get well soon brah!
-----------------------/Taylor, My Love For You Is Like A
Beard Grab (Joab)
Like Sheba, all adversity to our upcoming date (please?)
can take its chances at insurrection but before royal convictions
like David’s, like ours, like my love for you he takes
flight
he has no choice but to run, perhaps harboring hellacious
hebephrenic thoughts
of mounting a counterstrike, of your second guesses at
dating me equivocating
of you listening to your agents, your gut instinct that
bemoans associations with leeches
paling around with non-celebs
perhaps you will just ignore my campaign he surmises
but to be honest, Taylor, I have to be merciless here
because even passivity,
and fatalistic laissez-faire musings, Amasa, are accomplices
to heartbreak feeding
nurturing the spirit of pessimism that precedes all fault
and failure in love
subjugating, in a sense, himself to the adversity that would
come against us
rather
my desire for you is cunning, wily and wondrously whimsical
tooth and nail, brick and mortar, bric-a-brac
doing whatever a kiss takes, whatever a conversation over
coffee takes
sparing not a moment
calling opportunity one last and the greatest of chances great
stone
in Gibeon
smirking sardonically because my resolve is like a cloak
bitter sword fastened upon the loins of my attraction erotic
attempts at hasty concealment, futile
and I will take this weak, gall less mentality that shrieks
give up
and abandon aggressive pursuit until the right time
to try to date another loser girl who spitefully rejects me
for tomorrow never comes and affinity swoops in like a hawk
in the field
of battle snatching prized possessions, altering destiny
my spirit resurrected staring at my own grave of lost time
and warm
cherished moments missed, no! at the suggestion cringing my teeth
grind
grabbing him by the beard of supposed decorum my duplicitous
a fake kiss
smiling at the attempt to dissuade my efforts at attaining your
attention
piercing the fifth rib of stubborn myopia foolish
so that the bowels of this preponderance negative thinking
rush out
splattering to the ground, dousing the dirt of dour shame
for all the world to see
that the intensity I have for you is Joab assiduous
genuflecting to none
---------------------2 Samuel 20:6-13
And David said to Abishai, Now shall Sheba the son of Bichri
do us more harm than did Absalom: take thou thy lord's servants, and pursue
after him, lest he get him fenced cities, and escape us. And there went out
after him Joab's men, and the Cherethites, and the Pelethites, and all the
mighty men: and they went out of Jerusalem, to pursue after Sheba the son of
Bichri. When they were at the great stone which is in Gibeon, Amasa went before
them. And Joab's garment that he had put on was girded unto him, and upon it a
girdle with a sword fastened upon his loins in the sheath thereof; and as he
went forth it fell out. And Joab said to Amasa, Art thou in health, my brother?
And Joab took Amasa by the beard with the right hand to kiss him. But Amasa
took no heed to the sword that was in Joab's hand: so he smote him therewith in
the fifth rib, and shed out his bowels to the ground, and struck him not again;
and he died. So Joab and Abishai his brother pursued after Sheba the son of
Bichri. And one of Joab's men stood by him, and said, He that favoureth Joab,
and he that is for David, let him go after Joab. And Amasa wallowed in blood in
the midst of the highway. And when the man saw that all the people stood still,
he removed Amasa out of the highway into the field, and cast a cloth upon him,
when he saw that every one that came by him stood still. When he was removed
out of the highway, all the people went on after Joab, to pursue after Sheba
the son of Bichri.
