Masochism

----------------/Acts Chronicles Ch 19 Pt 3/3; Masochism: The Thoughts Of the Possessed Man On The Vagabond Jews Attempting Exorcism

The dialect of the horrified and the tongue of the guilt plagued
screams incivility,
insurrection and orgy...it does not speak Hebrew or greek but
idiosyncratic linguistics that render all else jargon all is drowned out
...by the cacophonies of the damned
awaiting judgement when the waning sun sets on all hope
never to return, traipsing in terrified trepidation traumatized
and tickled equally
at the words of Jesus spoken to our kin "leave this place....for Hell
reserved for the reprobate" the penurious too selfish to love
and before the eyes of the just we are all laid bare, nude
and before the eyes of the just we are all without excuse
our heads hang in shame, we enter likeminded bodies with vacant souls
men and women who feel the weight of the world
mired in sin without the mettle to resist or simply in disadvantageous
conditions abandoned by their cowardly choosing indifference we
kindred beings journeying to the other side of Hades with fire
scabs, blisters and bleeding
wanting only solitude and introversion suffering seizures shimmying
sharply, apoplectically avoiding light on skin even from the moon
(or mass casualties that eventually engender the same)
only allowing the host body nourishment and water so as to be granted
a stay of execution
this is
a miserable life; darkness; black - wonderful
rotted teeth a badge of honor, putrid breath requisite stripes for entry
into fraternity this is our only clothing, depression is a sandal, self loathing a cloak
misanthropes snarling at sinister words from middling meddlers who
try and interfere
who try and draw us out into linear trajectories of destiny
(besides entering and exiting bodies feels to us like a scourge)
preferring rather the cyclical, eternal circle and cycle of suffering
this is evil - it is pain and it is pleasurable it is perverted paradox
precious to the possessed
pleasing only to those who talk incessantly of catastrophe
rendering the weak powerless imitators of Paul baffled
confusing to those yet to be cruelly chastised because they dont know
language of spirits malicious with onyx eyes
that scowl

if not righteous in Christ then you are vapid, unable to speak to our
destruction in the eternal lake encircled by flames, scintillating
your intentions babble and irritating the only dialogue
we comprehend? - barrenness
those who speak otherwise will be made to feel as we do:
bloodied beaten and naked men howling for mercy
running for their lives
frantically


--------------
Acts 19:13-20
Then certain of the vagabond Jews, exorcists, took upon them to call over them which had evil spirits the name of the Lord Jesus, saying, We adjure you by Jesus whom Paul preacheth. And there were seven sons of one Sceva, a Jew, and chief of the priests, which did so. And the evil spirit answered and said, Jesus I know, and Paul I know; but who are ye? And the man in whom the evil spirit was leaped on them, and overcame them, and prevailed against them, so that they fled out of that house naked and wounded. And this was known to all the Jews and Greeks also dwelling at Ephesus; and fear fell on them all, and the name of the Lord Jesus was magnified. And many that believed came, and confessed, and shewed their deeds. Many of them also which used curious arts brought their books together, and burned them before all men: and they counted the price of them, and found it fifty thousand pieces of silver. So mightily grew the word of God and prevailed.

The Centurion's Monologue

"Matthew 27:54
Now when the centurion, and they that were with him, watching Jesus, saw the earthquake, and those things that were done, they feared greatly, saying, Truly this was the Son of God."


-----------The Centurion's Monologue

It was just a few hours ago...my numbed mind now drifts
Cat o' nine tails ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FU*&ING MIND
is what I asked him
then as an act of mercy from this grizzled centurion with
a face mangled and worn from the swords, knives and
passionate animus wielded by my foes of war: the Galls,
my fellow Romans in Antony and Octavian's civil wars the Sicilian revolt
... pleading with this pitiable weighted soul,
a sheep without a trace of belligerence yet obstinate in spirit
resignation to slaughter, bold embrace of cruelty air of cockiness
refusing to recant in the face thereof
inexorable onslaught and unbearable jeering to any man
with even the slightest iota of self dignity, pride
abscond from the throne of your inveterate need for victory
disregard your sterling reputation, your "aura"
empathize with all the failures of past great men, understood as necessary
rites of passage to maturation and eventual success
(Ptolemy, Alexander the Great, Cleopatra)
continue the miracles I told him...remember those yet to be healed
as it was purported that he relieved the afflicted with panache
and otherworldly effectiveness
all roads lead to Rome and many many many noble men
have found this instructive and quite poignant;
were stretched and bent by this great Republic yet didnt break
in kneeling they found liberation not shackles
[Rome beautiful matron of the gods of Olympus]
a support structure and an absolute glorious and all powerful
empire back of them
"why should you be any different?" hope in Romulus and Remus
and the opportunities afforded you pay homage to Caesar and these
whips
this crown of thorns you shall be given leave of
this crucifixion you shall not own..
...he told me "rather than to Caesar pay homage
to a life truly lived" that he hated what sin did to the human race
...that it deteriorated and continues to erode all our joy
with slow yet determinedly steady abandon
(which, he said engenders our need to beat, flog and curse our own kind)
he said he preferred to suffer so as to show us all a better way
that the most majestic and potent empire doesn't send its soldiers to die
so that women can be raped and children enslaved
but that we would in the end all lay down our weapons
and love one another




(....after staring at his lifeless body for quite some time I realized truly
that this man was God's son...the Son of God)

Wager On The Bright Morning Star (Satan Rules, Dude)

(photo courtesy of http://lasalettejourney.blogspot.com)

*dedicated to Wocka Flocka, Round Of Applause

[The setting: A large mountaintop overlooking lush and breathtaking valleys filled with dazzling arrays of exotic mediterranean fauna, vegetation and villages intricately designed and aesthetically pleasing in its first century domestic and civic flattering architectural style. Yet with astounding and staggering dynamism, Satan commenced by the wave of his hand, is able to change the landscape below to any epoch, past, present or future with varying levels of specificity regarding range of vision, subject matter, etc correlating with his desire. Satan and Jesus stand shoulder to shoulder speaking to one another though their eyes hold fast to the scenes beneath them. Tony approaches them from behind, sweating profusely after his long ascent to this peak, but refrains from interrupting].

Tony (whispering to himself and crouching to sit on a rock nearest him): Man, this bamma Satan is bout to get popped upside his head, nah'm sayin.....??? But anyways, Im gonna keep my mouth shut this time, ya'll...listen up!
[Satan turns around, surprisingly aware of Tony's presence despite his attempt at using stealth]

Satan (mischievously grinning- seemingly always): TOOONNNYY, my friend come..come join us!
[Tony cautiously approaches]

Satan (continuing): And for you, my friend, a cup of wine
[Satan snaps his finger and a cup of the finest wine of the day is spawned in Tony's palm once closed but since forced open]

Tony (suspicious): Whats...ahem (clearing his throat) Whats this for?

Satan (cutting his eyes back to Tony and contriving a fake smile after a brief glare at Jesus, who is still peering down the mountain):.....why, for your blog! THEJESUS-FU*(&ING METAPHOR! ...excuse me...for your blog, why you are almost at four hundred posts, no?

Tony (without hesitation): 500...sir

Satan (chuckling): ...my most humble mistake. Well....(after a slight wistful pause) ...congratulations [Satan nods his head and courtesies mockingly though subtly]

Tony (still suspicious):....th-thanks sir. You are exquisitely dresse...
[Satan interrupts Tony by grabbing him by the throat and immediately and vigorously hurls Tony off the edge of the mountain. His trailing screams dissapear]

Satan (scowling at Jesus then looking below as before): Now Jesus...where were we?


"and the glory of them" - Matthew 4
----------------/Wager On The Morning Star; Satan's Words To Jesus On The Mountain (pt 2)

It's beautiful isnt it? Creation
this is our Red Wine* moment, here together staring
at choice, and infinite possibility we are a rare breed no?
before, in "heaven" perhaps you mistook my apprehension at 'god's glory
as treason
but perchance now there may be some commiseration, some balking
at the limitations of the flesh
at restrictions and denials
at hunger...and thirst: all forms of abject poverty
I know I did as an imprisoned soul but god underestimated my potential
to galvanize to inspire to spur oneself onward.....
didnt he...or she....or it....?
(my angels testify)
Im not here, rather you were not whisked here
because you bear the likeness and similitude
of every other pathetic weak knobby kneed
human being boasting bombastically bellowing on about the

manifest destiny
his feeble, anemic, ineffectual, indistinct, flaccid "determination" and
willpower will somehow actuate
when in all honesty and all is laid bare, he cries himself to sleep every night
over fears of his marauding foes, his general insecurities or lack of control
diseased peons dying so easily
is all these will ever be but not you, my friend
there is a gleam in your eye reminiscent of the created sun

that rules this world
nourishing and supplementing all life. I see it when the world rises and
wakes me
a glimmer, a ray of depth of character and nobility
that shall not ever be seen again when you're gone*
but herein lies our conundrum - the morning star
that illumines all kingdoms past
that will illume and animate all kingdoms future
without my blessing, all those aforementioned men have fallen broken
by adversity....
but I stand beside you to offer you a choice between
this light.... and darkness
all the kingdoms, all their accoutrements...yours
no more languishing in deserts delirious delusional
about some "father's" will that does not and has never existed
with me, there is only wine
the inebriation of acquiring each of your wildest fantasies
(paling in comparison to you drooling over stones that will never be bread
lusting but never attaining)
wealth, homage, women especially the comely buxom ones
the awareness that you are indeed not only a son of god but God
ruler and author of your own fate
free from celestial tyranny, punishment for ambition
in my kingdom, the only crucifixion you face is that of self denial
but thats nothing that oral copulation cant fix
and that an ego boost and massaging of self esteem cant commute
divinity, you see, is not bestowed but earned
chosen not preordained
an awakening from and rebellion against the fantasy
of limitation
and who is qualified to deny that any can be "God" if they so choose?

fall down and worship me
lest I turn my back and blackness descends on your hope and optimism
and you continue to starve in the desert of your asinine faith
that compels you to miserable famishing
that chains you to a inexorable gruesome demise
that you even will later admit
is "not my will"


----------------/
Matthew 4:8-9
Again, the devil taketh him up into an exceeding high mountain, and sheweth him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them; And saith unto him, All these things will I give thee, if thou wilt fall down and worship me.
-------Round of Applause Lyrics

Round of applause baby make that a* clap
Drop it to the floor make that a* clap
Round of applause baby make that a* clap
Drop it to the floor make that a* clap
Let me see you
Bust it [6x]
Baby drop it to the floor
And
Bust it [6x]

Bounce that a* shake that ass like the tweark team
Hair long a* fat shawty mean
That girl look like hally berry when I'm on no means
When I hit the scene girls yelling and they scream
Flocka can you be my baby daddy pimpin like I'm dolemite hoes jump in my caddy.
Smoke like I got cataracts
In the strip club throwin up them stacks
I got racks on top of racks, bust that p* make that a*
Clap clap clap
I ain't done with you baby bring that a* back
Still got twenty still got 50 even got those hundreds
Throw sum money throw sum money I'ma let it go
Waka flocka flame better know as mr.let it go

[Chorus:]
Round of applause baby make that a* clap
Drop it to the floor make that a* clap
Round of applause baby make that a* clap
Drop it to the floor make that a* clap
Let me see you
Bust it [6x]
Baby drop it to the floor
And
Bust it [6x]

Corner stacks omg smh when I'm them stage pourin rose all on her a*
Round of a applause baby pop that p* drop it down for me do a split
Do you smoke girl got a zip white Remy Martin who wanna sip...
.45 on my hip but I get one deep and every word I say is slurring.
Vision man is blurring.
Drunk too much liquor smoke too much weed b* on to much E
I'm so high! Roll the beat beat.
And double strip club shawty I'ma big tipper
Two hundred and I pull down my zipper
Shawty say she love me and she wanna meet my crew
BRICKSQUAD nigga is where we go hard

[Chorus:]
Round of applause baby make that a* clap
Drop it to the floor make that a* clap
Round of applause baby make that ass clap
Drop it to the floor make that a* clap
Let me see you
Bust it [6x]
Baby drop it to the floor
And
Bust it [6x]

Bounce that a* shake that a* like the tweark team
Bust it bust it like the tweark team
Bust it bust it like the tweark team
Bricksquad monopoly shawty that's my home team
Smokin that gangsta green can't do no g told
I need a classy girl but in the bed she gotta be a freak tho
Bust it bust it lay down on that flow girl
Bust it bust it give me sum mo head girl

Round of applause baby make that a* clap
Drop it to the floor make that a* clap
Round of applause baby make that a* clap
Drop it to the floor make that a* clap
Let me see you
Bust it [6x]
Baby drop it to the floor
And
Bust it [6x]

[Chorus:]

Wo man

*Dedicated to Fabolous, You Be Killin Em

Yall know Im girl crazy right? But I think all the fellas can agree - I dont have a choice!


----------------/Woman; Adam's Thoughts In The Garden As He Watches Eve Presented To Him


In Paradise all of life is grass and hollow winds
when the beasts of the field and the fowls of the air witness to the sun
side by side reassured, eyelids shut in gestures of appreciation
solidarity with their Creator
I pay homage to deception, the moon. deep sighs and silent tears
for inertia
I have no language, no identity no distinctness no desire
to eat from the tree of life for existence is just another in a long
succession of exhalations of angst
a soul's dirge for meaninglessness that my pride refuses to join in
at night shrill echoes of denials
of that now seemingly dubious assessment that life is good

Prayers for a dream of a dawning of consciousness
a spiritual yearning for validation manifested
for honesty's bright rays of beauty to shine a light
on the dilapidated doldrums of the depression of loneliness
in a garden trumped up as bliss...
for wounds to be dressed in areas of limitation
(lower back, upper shoulder, psychological myopia)

And I have seen mountain ridges seemingly dance before
breathtaking flashes of the sunrise, and morning mist - giant
majestic birds spread their wings above, their intricate design of feathers
an alluring mosaic dedicated to morality; swirling clouds luminescent
illumined by aggregations of bright dazzling heavenly stars
shouting for sacred serenity....But I need mesmerization
show me breasts of zealous ambition for titillating pursuits
forever enchanting
startle me with wide hips that beckon and yearn for a community
and time invested in its continuance
soft lips that not only speak but mystify in their intuition
that understand me perspicaciously
in ways I never foreknew
beguile me with round thighs that whisper to me
"you never want to be alone" long hair that inspires obeisance
when extended
and flitting enticing eyes that suggest destiny,
that together we can conquer the previously known world, now changed

"Woman"
bone of my bone flesh of my flesh
lets create, destroy the world together
never to be apart

-----------Genesis 2:17-23
But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die. And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.


---You be Killin Em Lyrics

Yo, what's up girl? Ain't gotta ask it
I dead 'em all now, I buy the caskets
They should arrest you or whoever dressed you
Ain't gon' stress you but I'mma let you know

Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em

You ain't gotta worry about her, shorty straight
Been chasing her for 2 days, first 48
A bad b* cost, she worth every cent
She look like the best money that I ever spent

Just watching my cutie pie get beautified
Make me want better jewels, a newer ride
Louis Vuitton shoes, she got too much pride
Her feet are killing her, I call it shoe-icide

Looking good has its sacrifices
Chilly weather bring 4 figure jacket prices
Her body nice, face dime
Give you that iPhone 4, face time

Shorty in the streets, still handle the home
Enough class for wine, still handle Patron
When them other ho's call, I hand her the phone
And she hand 'em the tone

Yo what's up, girl? Ain't gotta ask it
I dead 'em all now, I buy the caskets
They should arrest you or whoever dressed you
Ain't gon' stress you but I'mma let you know

Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em

Yeah, I know that's what they all says
She gotta donkey with a Juan Valdez
Keep it clean, cut like bald heads
Been playin' with that green long as Paul Pierce

So you gotta ball harder than them ball players
All she wanna know is there a mall near us
Can't fault her, the last nigga spoiled her
But he ain't beat it up, I assault her

Should've seen her come to me when I called her
Slow strut like she walking to the altar
Hand bag on her arm cost four bills
And she ain't gotta beg, borrow, or steal

Often imitated, never duplicated
They say she a dime, I say she underrated
I just met her so the next solution
Dead my old chick, execution

Yo, what's up, girl? Ain't gotta ask it
I dead 'em all now, I buy the caskets
They should arrest you or whoever dressed you
Ain't gon' stress you but I'mma let you know

Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em, you be killin' 'em
Girl, you be killin' 'em

(You be killin' 'em)
Had to let you know
(You be killin' 'em)
(You be killin' 'em, girl, you be killin' 'em)

To all the ladies
(You be killin' 'em)
I'd like to congratulate you
(You be killin' 'em)
Congratulations
(You be killin' 'em, girl, you be killin' 'em)

And you just came from the gym clothes
In a fitted cap and some Timbo's
And a pair of flats, well trimmed toes
Camera in the mirror, B.B.M. pose

Still killin' 'em ho's
You still killin' 'em ho's
You still killin' 'em ho's

Dust Shaken (Ann Hathaway Come Back....Please!!!)

* Dedicated to Secondhand Serenade, Your Call
* Dedicated to Anne Hathaway (the real one) for being so beautiful, on account of which I directed my love (unfortunately now proven to be ill fated and barren) towards your doppelgänger at Champps
* And of course, dedicated to you, R*, the waitress of all waitresses at Champps, so captivating (if anyone sees her, tell her I pine for her!!!)

R*, I wanted you so passionately, yet....it wasnt good enough for you was it? I asked you out and you....
(Hey guys, you see this pic? My girl looks EXACTLY like this!)

[BY THE WAY, TO DELVE INTO AN UNRELATED TOPIC, PURCHASE YOUR TICKETS TO THE DARK KNIGHT SOON! ONLY A FEW WEEKS AWAY!!! OH YEAH!!!]


-----------------/Dust Shaken

You had the gospel of life for my middling pagan heart limited
by the callousness of the naive and sometimes willful sins of not being
classy enough, "cool" enough or cavalier enough
to grasp the intricacies of your Jewish rituals and air of sophistication
or tongue of pure grace and dignity, unadulterated language promulgated
precisely
by Moses' pious poignantly pronounced proclamations of prerequisites
of a potential suitor's worth.....
to receive admittance into the kingdom of your endearment (my God)
the sun of anticipation at your back
I gazed at you from across the bar at Champps
like two disciples two emissaries of majestic intentions
dark hair, alluring eyes, titillating physique much as it befits a hopeless race
expecting heralds holding hope for a better tomorrow and healing
of a sick lonely and dejected soul
(I daydreamed of kissing you beneath the rising full moon)

My house was painstakingly prepared for your arrival
I swept the dust off the floors of my mannerisms, I tidied the fumbled
words I would otherwise normally speak. I defecated in the men's room
so as not to expose you to nervous flatulence
when you walked past I asked you out, extending the most noble of the gestures within the parameters
of such capacity
I wanted you to look in my eyes past the deficiencies and shortcomings
but for some disheartening reason my olive branch for you was deemed
a thicket
when you arrived at the domicile of my hospitality and overture
you turned around and shook the dust of rejection
from your feet
as a testimony to my futility and failure

(I die...in my sins. Without redemption)



---------------------/
Luke 9:1-5
Then he called his twelve disciples together, and gave them power and authority over all devils, and to cure diseases. And he sent them to preach the kingdom of God, and to heal the sick. And he said unto them, Take nothing for your journey, neither staves, nor scrip, neither bread, neither money; neither have two coats apiece. And whatsoever house ye enter into, there abide, and thence depart. And whosoever will not receive you, when ye go out of that city, shake off the very dust from your feet for a testimony against them.


----Your Call lyrics

Waiting for your call, I'm sick, call I'm angry
Call I'm desperate for your voice
Listening to the song we used to sing
In the car, do you remember
Butterfly, Early Summer
It's playing on repeat, Just like when we would meet
Like when we would meet

Cause I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

Stripped and pollished, I am new, I am fresh
I am feeling so ambitious, you and me, flesh to flesh
Cause every breath that you will take
When you are sitting next to me
Will bring life into my deepest hopes, What's your fantasy?
(What's your, what's your...)

Cause I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home
[X4]
(I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have)

Cause I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

Cause I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight
(I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have)

Peter (Walking towards a [Buxom] Green Eyed Ghost)

*dedicated to Alesana, Annabel


I'll be succinct here. Jennifer you know Im crazy about you, but also that Im aware of the fact that you've since moved on after my vulnerable and dedicated declaration of my love for you. Its been years. So why did we cross paths a few weeks ago; a portal to a lapse in time....when I looked into your green eyes and fell on my knees. Are...are you a ghost? Im afraid. Im afraid I still want you (almost 6 years later)? JE-SUS awww baby!


-----------/Peter - A Ghost (In Rockville)

In a boat of loneliness on the fourth watch of the night of waning
desperation is where you left me when we last spoke
memories of your green eyes, symmetrical face and buxom chest like winds
contrary to my utmost yearnings for love requited
you left me rocking
you left me unsteady
in dire straights and unfit to see the morning (of hope
of you falling for me too)
I gave you my love a note penned with the ink of utmost sincerity
and fear and in return you walked away tantamount to retorting
a death wish in the rocky waters of dating you left me to
drown
schizophrenia are my only companions you have reduced me to twelve
fragments of my former self, your disciples now of varying temperament
and belief bickering
should I continue in my adoration of you? Should I panic and jump overboard
and sink to an inglorious romantic end
were the thoughts raging and ricocheting in my mind when we
by fate (destiny?) crossed paths two weeks ago
Jennifer, I am troubled when I see you now
it causes me to question my sanity and objectivity and full of equivocation
was your rejection of me real, or when our eyes met was I hallucinating
the pretty beguiling eyes of a ghost
because I do get horny and I do get lonely and I just want to know your kiss
and none of me was astute enough to bring a paddle
to row back to the shore of closure, of letting go
(the waves are too violent, besides)
the most noble part of me wants to chase after you and walk on water
of the impossibility that your feelings for me may have changed
and that you are the Savior of the World
(of my heart)


[Jennifer, I would drop everything and come running to you if you ever came calling. I miss the exhilaration of falling in love with you. I made myself so vincible with you....I gave you my heart...but also the power of a knife to kill it)

--------/
Matthew 14:23-26, 28
And when he had sent the multitudes away, he went up into a mountain apart to pray: and when the evening was come, he was there alone. But the ship was now in the midst of the sea, tossed with waves: for the wind was contrary. And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea. And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, It is a spirit; and they cried out for fear. And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water.

----Alesana - Annabel Lyrics

How does the dagger feel now when you're on the receiving end?
If this is what you call betrayal.
Then this is what I call revenge.

How could I be so blind?
I guess I fell in love too quickly...
But I'm fine.

Imagine where you'd be now if you only knew.
The one you love is the one who's killing you.
I trusted you too much.
I know now that I should have kept my eyes wide open.
The first time that we kissed.
I'll bury you for this.

Just say to me that this time is the last time.
And I'll pretend that somehow I know we'll be fine.

Years spent watching in silence as your illness spilled onto page.
Those were the last days I spend with you.
Before you left, before he came.

How could I be so blind?
I guess I fell in love too quickly...
But I'm fine.

Imagine where you'd be now if you only knew.
The one you love is the one who's killing you.
I trusted you too much.
I know now that I should have kept my eyes wide open.
The first time that we kissed.
I'll bury you for this.

Just say to me that this time is the last time.
And I'll pretend I'm fine.
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/a/alesana/annabel.html ]
Oh It is my fault?
You fell into that illusion you've been living discretely.
Oh Should I blame you in the end?
Did you ever think the sketches would take over completely?
(Oh is it my fault)
(Oh is it my fault)

Die!
Just die!
You are scum!
You are filth!
Choke on blood as your knife ends the show! Write in pain you thought you'd

Never know!
I don't think they dig graves close enough to hell for the likes of you!
I don't think they dig graves close enough to hell for the likes of you!

I handed you a knife and my heart oh
I handed you a knife and my heart oh
And now the dream is over...
And now the dream is over...

I handed you a knife and my heart oh
I handed you a knife and my heart oh
And now the dream is over...
And now the dream is over...

How could I be so blind?
I guess I fell in love too quickly...
But I'm fine.

Imagine where you'd be now if you only knew.
The one you love is the one who's killing you.
I trusted you too much.
I know now that I should have kept my eyes wide open.
The first time that we kissed.
I'll bury you for this.

I handed you a knife and my heart oh
I handed you a knife and my heart oh
And now the dream is over...
And now the dream is over...

I handed you a knife and my heart oh
I handed you a knife and my heart oh
And now the dream is over... ohh
And now the dream is over...

I handed you a knife and my heart oh
I handed you a knife and my heart oh
And now the dream is over... ohh
And now the dream is over...

Haters Need To Repent!!!

Ayo JEZUS!!!! wut...UP...SON??? We back up in this joint - nah mean??? So yeah, I gotz to admit, I took a little nap nah mean? I GOT SOME SLEEP! YAY-YAYEEEE!!! I TOOK A FEW MONTHS OFF FROM BLOGGING TO GET MY HEAD STRIZ-AIGHT!!! AYO JEZUS!!!! So look man, deze katz out here be hating more than a you know what, NAH'M SAYING J??? Frankly, my dude, I find all the jealousy, snide remarks, and constant condescension wearisome, 4 reelz!! Im just trying to live my life, nahm saying and these dudes (and dudettes) just be trying to foil any plans I have for my own success...minding my own business, ironically! I didz nothing to inconvenience or perturb anyone! Well now, YOUVE ENCROACHED ON THE WRONG PERSON'S TERRITORY! You haters have roused me out of my peaceful blogging slumber cranky and irritable! (AND MY BREATH STINKS!! OOO YOURE GONNA PAY NOW!!!) You hate me huh? WELL I HATE THAT YOU HATE ME!!! HUUUHHHH!!! Listen, you jealous hater type cats got me all frothy, kid! Im foaming out of my sheeshin' mouth!!! Guess what? You can shoot me, but you cant kill me - God is my Father, punks....and therefore: I am eternal!!! GGRRRRRR!!! I AM....FROTHING AT THE MOUTH...!!!!! I AM A BLOGGING RABBID DOG!!! RUFF RUFF!!!

Dis one is dedicated to Jesus, aka Jeezy for sheezy, aka The Crowned Don, aka Jebus Christ, aka Jebus in Da HOOOOOOUUUSSEEE! HOLY SPIRIT! fill me up son, I need help on writing this one!!!

Hay - Hay - Hay- Tony Conti Haters! Listen up!!!


-------------/Repent: My July 2012 Thoughts As Jesus Exhaling His Last Breaths

You are Roman Soldiers blind
in your loyalty to a maniacal demigod your psyche displaced
with death's daily and dire deception, maddening manipulation your minds
nestled on polarity, incongruously accepting the notion that
a spear driven
into the side of the innocent, blood spilled as cruelly as it is unjustly
assures you of fine wines in jewel encrusted cups in Hades
toasting to your former days of youthful glory here never fading
that Jupiter will cup your face in his mighty redoubtable hands
and affirm you with robust words, that Venus might seduce
and kiss and make love to you forever.....
musing airily while the ear piercing cracking of your whips
on my back are
transmuted as cymbals faintly played by cupid, Minerva overseeing
and smiling at your procession to godhood in your misguided fantasies
whilst, back in the objective experiential world the smiles are
mine, masochistic
whilst the crowds of Jews of your pernicious desires for me laugh
and mock and the women of your inner need for histrionics weep
wailing for the emptiness in your souls as a chronic disease untreatable
(you will never become me, or simulate my success)
disguised as a drawn out homage to my shameful defeat
yet all of your harsh arsenal is deployed in vain: the futility of
the crown of thorns perforating and abrading my skull
I AM restive
frothing at the mouth and grinning sinisterly the nails in my hands
the nails spiritedly driven in my feet especially
spawn a joyous jolt of fervor throughout my body you may mistake
for the excruciating convulsions,
of a flaccid limp soul dying to this world beneath the weight of your
pompous impregnable wrath
yet this is apoplectic giddy ritual, frenzied tribal dance preparation
for my return in splendid and irresistible Glory
although you may harangue me for a time, I will never die
my hope and my mirth and my peace are eternal
the Caesar you wish to honor is the Caesar you kill
yet it is too late to amend your mistakes

(when you see me again you will be on your knees in involuntary obeisance)


----------/
Matthew 27:27-30;46: "Then the soldiers of the procurator took Jesus into the praetorium, and gathered together about him the whole cohort. And they stripped him and put on him a scarlet cloak; and plaiting a crown of thorns, they put it upon his head, and a reed into his right hand; and bending the knee they mocked him, saying "Hail, King of the Jews!" And they spat on him, and took the reed and kept striking him on the head." And about the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?” that is, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?”

Romans 14:11 For it is written: “As I live, says the LORD, Every knee shall bow to Me, And every tongue shall confess to God.”