Love's Battle --Betrayed

Matthew 26:49 Immediately Judas went to Jesus and said, "Hail, Rabbi!" and kissed Him.

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=711872684455

*dedicated to S*S*** and J*C*

---------------------------------/Love's Battle. The Thoughts Of Jesus As He is Kissed By Judas/

We dipped hands in the same bowl
shared the same money – traveled to
the same places. When the sea raged I rescued you,
calming winds, casting demons out too disciplined for your
fledgling faith and paucity of prayer and fasting
They say the most acute pain
comes from the bonds of the greatest strength forged
in vulnerability and honesty, when they are broken;
that those closest to us inflict the most severe pain
because whom you first love is whom tears your soul asunder
when they walk away....forever
from everything good you offered them...into the arms of treachery
(often for inane, thoughtless reasons)
at night you make me stare at the moon
and consider rewriting all the hymns my life has composed
upon reflection you were the one discordant note
compassionately overlooked
the rebel I hoped would reform
but now my there are no stars, no moon to guide my steps
only onyx pastels and black cumulus clouds; the pitch dark
and melancholy writhing
only splayed by torch lights and rugged worn soldiers with spears
ready to fight
but this is the wrong battle


(a battle my broken heart just cant win - we shouldnt be fighting each other)


------------------------------------------
John 13:27 After the morsel, Satan then entered into him. Therefore Jesus said to him, "What you do, do quickly."

Luke 22:20-23 In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, "This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you. But the hand of him who is going to betray me is with mine on the table. The Son of Man will go as it has been decreed, but woe to that man who betrays him." They began to question among themselves which of them it might be who would do this.

John 13:21 When Jesus had said this, He became troubled in spirit, and testified and said, "Truly, truly, I say to you, that one of you will betray Me."

Matthew 26:23 And He answered, "He who dipped his hand with Me in the bowl is the one who will betray Me.

Really Beautiful

"Now Peter and John went up together to the temple at the hour of prayer, the ninth hour. And a certain man lame from his mother's womb was carried, whom they laid daily at the gate of the temple which is called Beautiful, to ask alms from those who entered the temple; who, seeing Peter and John about to go into the temple, asked for alms. And fixing his eyes on him, with John, Peter said, "Look at us." So he gave them his attention, expecting to receive something from them. Then Peter said, "Silver and gold I do not have, but what I do have I give you: In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, rise up and walk." And he took him by the right hand and lifted him up, and immediately his feet and ankle bones received strength. So he, leaping up, stood and walked and entered the temple with them—walking, leaping, and praising God. And all the people saw him walking and praising God. Then they knew that it was he who sat begging alms at the Beautiful Gate of the temple; and they were filled with wonder and amazement at what had happened to him." Acts 3:1-10

* dedicated to Linkin Park "Leave Out All The Rest"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z6KKlRzvmZ0


http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=711329238525

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=711325091835

------------------/Really Beautiful: The Thoughts of The Crippled Man At The Beautiful Gate Healed By Peter/



On the fringes, unprivileged
carried to the temple, but dropped at its doors
a pariah
hungry but not fed, left to beg
marginalized....resigned to mediocrity
dreams of prestige recanted since birth –
since when I tried to walk but was incapable
Pharisees postulate in the synagogues but their words
fall on a hardened conscience, my jilted soul broken
leaning my back on the Beautiful Gate
with an ugly trajectory auguring a life forsaken
give me your coins
at night I'll wash them with bitter tears
then throw them
in the Lake of Gennesaret

Longing, desperate for love
weary from life’s journey of adversity
desperate for attention
I feel like I am an accoutrement of the Temple
an artifact, a cautionary anecdote for others
(a morbid statue glanced at but never engaged)
to abstain from sin
when it rains, the doors close
dogs scurry in...I am left outside
drenched
(when the gates close I am thrown in the roads)
forgotten, ears pierced by peals of thunder
lightning strikes singe my feet
forever overlooked, undesired without a wife
without posterity forever
shackled to this fate by God

Somebody please love me,
grab me by the hand
lift me up into your arms,
hoist my torso up – join it to yours
despite the imbalance, despite losing your center of gravity
your intense gaze may inspire me
your tender eyes may reverse the cumulative effect
of being perceived as odious
and reprehensible by my parents and kin
a boy mocked
but a callous heart's veneer cracking
by your care
your companionship is like
walking and jumping and praising God to me
if someone would just talk to me
invite me in
accepted, cared for, incorporated into community
my feet and ankles would immediately grow strong
proud to stand and dance the whole time
I would run in the Temple
and start praising God
I swear




----Leave Out All The Rest Lyrics

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shed but I made

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are

Penelope Cruz, The Wall Obstructing Our Love Will Fall - Trust Me!

-----------------/Penelope Cruz – The Walls Stopping Our Love Will Fall Down Flat/---

Jericho is the city of our adoration shared
a city of palm trees of jubilee,
a city rife with treasures of intimacy -
gold kisses, silver back rubs, brass meals over candlelight,
iron nuzzling with loving smiles– tightly shut
protected by intractable, towering walls of stone and mortar
but I want the land (badly), because it is the promise of love
bequeathed to me from you
no one can withhold it from me, not without resistance
not without seven priests bearing seven trumpets of rams' horns
of my steadfast devotion to you (blaring loudly)
not without armed men of my loyalty before them
and the rear guard of my jealousy behind
guarding the Ark of the Covenant of my zeal for our marriage
circling the city and its fugitive inhabitants
for six days, homage paid to the six days of creation
the six days it took for me to fall for you
but the seventh day will be inviolable
and I wont let dour pagan forces withstand my advances
any longer. On the seventh we encircle,
on the seventh we beset, and shout with all our might
to the virtues of the affinity of two people
who hold each other dear, who deserve happiness forever
we shout to the inherent right of a man to cherish his woman
and then suddenly
the fortified walls that stand between fulfillment of our dreams
will fall flat, crumbling rocks scattered for miles
everyone left inside will be accursed and troubled
my all consuming longing for this day will destroy them
and take back the treasure that belongs to you,
and to me
Jericho, is ours Penelope,
the Promised Land of true love
wont be denied us


(I love you baby! Next time you make a movie let me be your beau!!!!)


----------------Joshua 6:6-21---------------
And Joshua the son of Nun called the priests, and said unto them, Take up the ark of the covenant, and let seven priests bear seven trumpets of rams' horns before the ark of the LORD. And he said unto the people, Pass on, and compass the city, and let him that is armed pass on before the ark of the LORD. And it came to pass, when Joshua had spoken unto the people, that the seven priests bearing the seven trumpets of rams' horns passed on before the LORD, and blew with the trumpets: and the ark of the covenant of the LORD followed them. And the armed men went before the priests that blew with the trumpets, and the rereward came after the ark, the priests going on, and blowing with the trumpets. And Joshua had commanded the people, saying, Ye shall not shout, nor make any noise with your voice, neither shall any word proceed out of your mouth, until the day I bid you shout; then shall ye shout. So the ark of the LORD compassed the city, going about it once: and they came into the camp, and lodged in the camp. And Joshua rose early in the morning, and the priests took up the ark of the LORD. And seven priests bearing seven trumpets of rams' horns before the ark of the LORD went on continually, and blew with the trumpets: and the armed men went before them; but the rereward came after the ark of the LORD, the priests going on, and blowing with the trumpets. And the second day they compassed the city once, and returned into the camp: so they did six days. And it came to pass on the seventh day, that they rose early about the dawning of the day, and compassed the city after the same manner seven times: only on that day they compassed the city seven times. And it came to pass at the seventh time, when the priests blew with the trumpets, Joshua said unto the people, Shout; for the LORD hath given you the city. And the city shall be accursed, even it, and all that are therein, to the LORD: only Rahab the harlot shall live, she and all that are with her in the house, because she hid the messengers that we sent. And ye, in any wise keep yourselves from the accursed thing, lest ye make yourselves accursed, when ye take of the accursed thing, and make the camp of Israel a curse, and trouble it. But all the silver, and gold, and vessels of brass and iron, are consecrated unto the LORD: they shall come into the treasury of the LORD. So the people shouted when the priests blew with the trumpets: and it came to pass, when the people heard the sound of the trumpet, and the people shouted with a great shout, that the wall fell down flat, so that the people went up into the city, every man straight before him, and they took the city. And they utterly destroyed all that was in the city, both man and woman, young and old, and ox, and sheep, and ass, with the edge of the sword.

Amanda Seyfried Is My Flour (Poured on Wild Gourds)

Amanda, please come be with me! Life tastes bland without you!

--------------/Amanda Seyfried Is My Flour (Poured on Wild Gourds)/---


My heart's throat is parched
my soul's lips are cracking...the scorching rays of loneliness
are onerous
and my desire for you is like the sons of the prophets
famished – holding their stomachs wincing, pangs
oh baby, I wish you would just hold me by the hand
and put on the large pot, and boil stew
of your tenderness and warm hugs,
because in the past other girls have gone out
into the field and gathered herbs of flattery for me
from the wild vine of their treacherous duplicity
picked from selfish wild gourds
I tried to eat from their bowls of fickle bonds
but my emotions were only shattered.
If Im consorting with anyone other than you, Amanda,
I wont consume...other girls are maladroit and cant cook
because if you arent here, with arms draped around me -
there is death in the pot!
Your love for me is flour
an antidote to my piercing dolefulness
melancholy years without a spouse
sprinkled over all the pains of my love-scarred past
enabling me to trust again
to close my eyes and exhale again
I adore you so much,
I need your unconditional sensitivity so bad
so I can eat again (stew of your kisses and long stares)
for with you by my side
there is nothing harmful in the pot

------------------------------2 Kings 4:38-41
And Elisha returned to Gilgal, and there was a famine in the land. Now the sons of the prophets were sitting before him; and he said to his servant, "Put on the large pot, and boil stew for the sons of the prophets." So one went out into the field to gather herbs, and found a wild vine, and gathered from it a lapful of wild gourds, and came and sliced them into the pot of stew, though they did not know what they were. Then they served it to the men to eat. Now it happened, as they were eating the stew, that they cried out and said, "Man of God, there is death in the pot!" And they could not eat it. So he said, "Then bring some flour." And he put it into the pot, and said, "Serve it to the people, that they may eat." And there was nothing harmful in the pot.

Dream Catchers

"Therefore let all the house of Israel know assuredly that God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ." Acts 2:36

Acts Chronicles Chapter 2

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=710656227245

----------------------------/Dream Catchers - The Thoughts of Jesus After Being Resurrected


No man wants to see his dreams forsaken
his legacy erased, or to know that he lived life in vain
unless he is too pained and plaintive to care
and lost faith in restitution
unless justice is too jaded to move to action
and tyranny reigns (in his mind)
and we all have lost things we've tried to retain
holding on with our fingers like a vise grip
but they slipped away
and their memories are like gashes to the soul
that scab and scar over time
reminding us of our existence’s perennial plight
to try and love people intensely
...immeasurably
though there is no sure guarantee of its return
but all things notwithstanding this is the hope you've
placed behind your aspirations to make a change in the world
predicated the bestowal of your gifts and healings on...
a dogged pursuit of the purity of mankind
(of family, of charity, of wiping away tears)
because you ruminate on these things and
you know deep inside
we weren’t made to hurt each other
not with whips, nails and a cross
nor to get old and die
but mostly the people that assail us are ignorant of their actions
and know not what they do
so in order to make sense of all this
and restore order to chaos, and right to wrongs
you cant let crucifixion stop you, or burial in tomb
sealed with a huge rock; and you wont -
not before your work is complete

I dont know what to do

----------------------/

I am restless
I must adhere to all the rules
conform to societal norms
against my will refrain my lips from speaking truthfully
for fear of coming on too strongly and scaring you away
yet you incessantly batter my mind
beset with musings on how compatible we are
how I would love you vigorously – and you would reciprocate
but we don't really know each other
and my consternations are coming to bear
what if you don't even.....
like, what if Im way off base and you never even considered me
that you would never deign to be with me
that Im not your "type"
and here I am beleaguered without you
my heart angst ridden
and you so carefree and nonchalant
Im too afraid to tell you I want to fall in love with you
I dread your terse rejection
I cant speak to you plainly because you and I are so different
people love you
people love to hate me
you were probably encouraged, complimented and cheered on
for the entirety of your life
I had guys punch me, laugh at me, openly mock me,
bellicose men concocting plots to fell me
on a regular basis. Ive been bullied....Im like Ishmael with his hand
against all nations that have arrows aimed his way
so I cant tell you Ive fallen for you
I cant risk your rejection
But I cant stop thinking about you

Wistful Clouds

"Men of Galilee, why do you stand gazing up into heaven? This same Jesus, who was taken up from you into heaven, will so come in like manner as you saw Him go into heaven." Acts 1:10-11

----Acts Chronicles Chapter 1 – Wistful Clouds – The Thoughts Of The Disciples Upon Seeing Jesus Depart---

This world is just too incongruous with our expectations
too heterogeneous to comport well
with our acute longings for a Jewish heritage shared
with You
because now the yoke still remains
our hearts still wrenched, the spears of the Roman guard
still refract sunlight that pierces our eyes
gleaming
a smug look as we cower walking by
a sneer if we exude joy
Caesar’s coins ensure water flows in our aqueducts
not David’s, not Solomon’s
and the prospect remains that Herod might kill our sons
we used to share these stories with You
as John laid on your breast, and Peter bungled our meal
spilling the fish on the ground excitedly recounting miracles
of the day
We remember watching You sleep
marveling that you didn’t snore, after the singing the hymns
(on verdant knolls)
you taught us staring at the moon, peering at the stars
consoling ourselves with sentiments
of Israel restored and Rome crushed beneath her foot
But now that Youre gone
exorcisms, walking on water, raising the dead, feeding the poor
healing the sick, restitution of the Promised Land
hauling in fish that strains our nets
elude us, hidden behind the clouds that shroud your path
and all we can do is gaze
tears streaming, minds harkening back
to the hills that gave us the best vantage of the night skyline
too scared to look away
too scared to be alone