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* dedicated to The Dangerous Summer, Catholic Girls
http://youtu.be/nRodn6_IcNU
* dedicated to Brand New, Soco Amaretto Lime
http://youtu.be/5hhJKhFQEHE
A quick, and dolorous, open letter to my female teenage heartthrob (she’s over 18, police officers!!!! Its ok sheriff!!!): I guess I don’t know how to let go of this fanciful paradigm that age is a secondary or even tertiary concern and that what’s most pertinent is this kinetic spark of attraction I feel between us…that I felt when we first met and I didn’t know your age. Alas, I must bury your memory and never again try to conjure it up. Goodbye. If only I wasn’t born when I was born, or vice versa. Goodbye, my love of miserable inopportunity. You would have been my balm for all the hags that have been rejecting me all these years, crushing my heart.
----------------/Saul
I dreamed about you yesterday, like a chalice of sweet wine,
served in the King’s palace in Israel,
we were gazing one upon the other quixotically…at first.
Reaching across the table, I put my hand under your chin
a gesture, tender and gentle, to my betrothed
seeking for subliminal cues of reciprocity,
my other hand strewn across your forearm
as candles danced beneath my ever shortening breaths,
flames in tribal dance
heart suspended in anticipation of a Queen.
Your response…”Shunem” bemused me, icy stare
cold eyes portending a Philistine nightmare startled me
jolting me
from sleep with a palpitating heart, bed drenched in sweat
of the spurned, sheets and pillows whispering memories
of all my previous failed loves, singing to me of the damned;
their melodies diminishing as my consciousness regained.
Hooves of prudish horses stampeding,
clanging of chainmail of practicality against swords of status quo
threaten a siege,
brigades of societal acceptances and norms,
like the howling and caterwauling of soldiers beset with bloodlust
gossip generals goading murder
jeering arrows in a quiver
intent on brutal slaughter and dismemberment
of a 33 year old man’s love for a 19 year old girl – out the back window
flipping on my feet, mounting my stubbornness like a steed fleeing in terror
(frightful of a future of us apart)
surreptitiously I snuck - cloak of shame, dagger of defensiveness-
to Endor: hermitage of fleeting hopes for the duly ostracized.
I should have killed my attraction for you, King of Amalek, long ago,
despicable ruler yet inherently glorious,
(décolletage like many sheep, many rubies)
Yet I let it stick around due to your beauty overwhelming
and an addictive smile
despite your sin of being born in 1995.
This is what the witch of my conviction, medium of harsh truth, spoke –
conjuring up my sublimated guilt like Samuel,
God’s prophet buried in irrelevancy long ago, senescent ghost of a past life
sternly rebuking me with his last dying gasps.
I had hoped he would abnegate the obvious condemnation
levied on our prospects of marrying,
but our 14 year age gap an insurmountable adversary
the inescapable Philistines, riders of death, savages
will kill me before the morning
and my expectations for romance, like sons born to me,
beheaded, burned and put in graves next to mine.
------------1 Samuel 28:3-23
Now Samuel had died, and all Israel had lamented for him and buried him in Ramah, in his own city. And Saul had put the mediums and the spiritists out of the land. Then the Philistines gathered together, and came and encamped at Shunem. So Saul gathered all Israel together, and they encamped at Gilboa. When Saul saw the army of the Philistines, he was afraid, and his heart trembled greatly. And when Saul inquired of the Lord, the Lord did not answer him, either by dreams or by Urim or by the prophets. Then Saul said to his servants, “Find me a woman who is a medium, that I may go to her and inquire of her.” And his servants said to him, “In fact, there is a woman who is a medium at En Dor.” So Saul disguised himself and put on other clothes, and he went, and two men with him; and they came to the woman by night. And he said, “Please conduct a séance for me, and bring up for me the one I shall name to you.” Then the woman said to him, “Look, you know what Saul has done, how he has cut off the mediums and the spiritists from the land. Why then do you lay a snare for my life, to cause me to die?” And Saul swore to her by the Lord, saying, “As the Lord lives, no punishment shall come upon you for this thing.” Then the woman said, “Whom shall I bring up for you?” And he said, “Bring up Samuel for me.” When the woman saw Samuel, she cried out with a loud voice. And the woman spoke to Saul, saying, “Why have you deceived me? For you are Saul!” And the king said to her, “Do not be afraid. What did you see?” And the woman said to Saul, “I saw a spirit ascending out of the earth.” So he said to her, “What is his form?” And she said, “An old man is coming up, and he is covered with a mantle.” And Saul perceived that it was Samuel, and he stooped with his face to the ground and bowed down. Now Samuel said to Saul, “Why have you disturbed me by bringing me up?” And Saul answered, “I am deeply distressed; for the Philistines make war against me, and God has departed from me and does not answer me anymore, neither by prophets nor by dreams. Therefore I have called you, that you may reveal to me what I should do.” Then Samuel said: “So why do you ask me, seeing the Lord has departed from you and has become your enemy? And the Lord has done for Himself as He spoke by me. For the Lord has torn the kingdom out of your hand and given it to your neighbor, David. Because you did not obey the voice of the Lord nor execute His fierce wrath upon Amalek, therefore the Lord has done this thing to you this day. Moreover the Lord will also deliver Israel with you into the hand of the Philistines. And tomorrow you and your sons will be with me. The Lord will also deliver the army of Israel into the hand of the Philistines.” Immediately Saul fell full length on the ground, and was dreadfully afraid because of the words of Samuel. And there was no strength in him, for he had eaten no food all day or all night. And the woman came to Saul and saw that he was severely troubled, and said to him, “Look, your maidservant has obeyed your voice, and I have put my life in my hands and heeded the words which you spoke to me. Now therefore, please, heed also the voice of your maidservant, and let me set a piece of bread before you; and eat, that you may have strength when you go on your way.” But he refused and said, “I will not eat.”
-----Catholic Girls Lyrics
Even with the walls around me,
I'll always miss the place where
I grew up.
It made us tough.
Simple love and wealthy families;
suicides of kids that died too young.
It broke us up.
And I remember laughing
when we caught up;
asking if that was still a part of me.
It's still a part of me.
At night we used to drive
until we couldn't.
All that we wanted
was some company,
and it was comforting.
We'll all carry on into the world.
Innocence was hard to stand by,
even with those catholic girls we loved;
when they gave it up.
Life goes on.
But I remember laughing
when we caught up;
asking if that was still a part of me.
It's still a part of me.
At night we used to drive
until we couldn't.
All that we wanted
was some company,
and it was comforting.
Visit with the Virden family;
Step inside the house I first felt love.
I earned that cut.
And Loriann I know you're out there
watching us continue to grow up.
You gave too much.
Your life goes on.
And I remember laughing
when we caught up;
asking if that was still a part of me.
It's still a part of me.
At night we used to drive
until we couldn't.
All that we wanted
was some company,
and it was comforting.
At night we used to drive
until we couldn't.
All that we wanted
was some company.
--------------Soco Amaretto Lime Lyrics
Passed out on the overpass
Sunday best and broken glass
Broken down from the bikes and bars
Suspended like spirits over speeding cars
You and me were kings over the parkway tonight
And tonight will go on forever while we
walk around this town like we own the streets
and stay awake through summer like we own the heat
Singing "everybody wake up (wake up) it's time to get down"
(everybody, everybody wake up its time to get down)
And when I pass the bottle back to Pete
on the overpass tonight, I bet we laugh
I'm gonna stay eighteen forever (cut me open)
So we can stay like this forever (sun poisoned)
And we'll never miss a party (this offer...)
cause we keep them going constantly (...stands forever)
And we'll never have to listen (new haircut)
to anyone about anything (new bracelet)
cause it's all been done and it's all been said (eyeliner)
we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get
The hell out of this town
Find some conversation
The low fuel lights been on for days
It doesn't mean anything
I've got another 500, 'nother 500 miles
before we shut this engine down,
we shut it down
I'm gonna stay eighteen forever (cut me open)
So we can stay like this forever (sun poisoned)
And we'll never miss a party (this offer...)
cause we keep them going constantly (...stands forever)
And we'll never have to listen (new haircut)
to anyone about anything (new bracelet)
cause it's all been done and it's all been said (eyeliner)
we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get (wait forever)
(you're just jealous cause I'm young and in love)
Eighteen forever (first kisses)
(your stomach's filled up but you're starved for conversation)
So we can stay like this forever (new stitches)
(you're spending all your nights growing old in your bed)
And we'll never miss a party (collar weekend)
(and your tearin up your photos cause you wanna forget... it's over)
cause we keep them going constantly (appearance ticket)
(you're just jealous cause I'm young and in love)
And we'll never have to listen (November to...)
(your stomach's filled up but you're starved for conversation)
to anyone about anything cause it's all been done (...remember)
(you're spending all your nights growing old in your bed)
and it's all been said (nightswimmers)
(and your tearin up your photos cause you wanna forget... it's over)
we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get
Just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous... [turntable scratch]
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