-------------/This Callous, Unfeeling Tyrannical Love for a Teen (1 Samuel 22)
R**** I remember, distinctly, when you left me,
that flight out of Adullam, cave of a teenager’s secret dignity
eyes set on Moab. I, like this draconian king to be feared,
stark and raving mad. Moab for you was akin
to a man of your approximate age, a towering refuge for your mom and dad,
and all their future husband expectations.
You must forgive me, for I had to know where you’d gone,
using this blog as a spear I had to interrogate all our friends,
upstanding scrupulous Benjamites, defenders of societal norms,
demanding of them knowledge of your soul’s whereabouts,
because at some point I lost sight of your heart.
For some reason,
convention and practicality you treat as priest, Ahimelech
the son of Ahitub, fully loathsome to me; It was he
who gave you Goliath’s sword, the grand moxie
to stand contrarian to a 32 year old man threatening his death-
sobering reminders of the 14 years that divide us-
your absence like deprivation of oxygen,
a withering, horrid, disreputable, ghastly dethroning.
How can I accept this depravity, this life without you near?
I want to hold your hand in a courtyard, we both,
dreamily gazing at the moon. My passion, Doeg the Edomite
is resolutely rebellious
is firmly entrenched in polemics and sedition of the status quo.
To anyone who proscribes our love, I hurl the edict,
last vestiges of my authority before senility,
becoming an invalid,
“YOU TURN AROUND AND ATTACK THE PRIESTS.”
May my passion for you slaughter all normality and prudence,
those eighty-five men who wore the linen ephod,
standing atop cultural ideals that stymie love,
blood of gossip falling from his sword (my love poems to you).
His victims hear the last words:
feel the wrath of a King condemned,
a lover forsaken,
Romantic Tyrant smitten by an 18 year old Catholic girl.
-------1 Samuel 22
So David departed from there and escaped to the cave of Adullam; and when his brothers and all his father’s household heard of it, they went down there to him. Everyone who was in distress, and everyone who was in debt, and everyone who was discontented gathered to him; and he became captain over them. Now there were about four hundred men with him.
And David went from there to Mizpah of Moab; and he said to the king of Moab, “Please let my father and my mother come and stay with you until I know what God will do for me.” Then he left them with the king of Moab; and they stayed with him all the time that David was in the stronghold. The prophet Gad said to David, “Do not stay in the stronghold; depart, and go into the land of Judah.” So David departed and went into the forest of Hereth. Then Saul heard that David and the men who were with him had been discovered. Now Saul was sitting in Gibeah, under the tamarisk tree on the height with his spear in his hand, and all his servants were standing around him. Saul said to his servants who stood around him, “Hear now, O Benjamites! Will the son of Jesse also give to all of you fields and vineyards? Will he make you all commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds?“ For all of you have conspired against me so that there is no one who discloses to me when my son makes a covenant with the son of Jesse, and there is none of you who is sorry for me or discloses to me that my son has stirred up my servant against me to lie in ambush, as it is this day.” Then Doeg the Edomite, who was standing by the servants of Saul, said, “I saw the son of Jesse coming to Nob, to Ahimelech the son of Ahitub.“He inquired of the LORD for him, gave him provisions, and gave him the sword of Goliath the Philistine.” Then the king sent someone to summon Ahimelech the priest, the son of Ahitub, and all his father’s household, the priests who were in Nob; and all of them came to the king. Saul said, “Listen now, son of Ahitub.” And he answered, “Here I am, my lord.”Saul then said to him, “Why have you and the son of Jesse conspired against me, in that you have given him bread and a sword and have inquired of God for him, so that he would rise up against me by lying in ambush as it is this day?” Then Ahimelech answered the king and said, “And who among all your servants is as faithful as David, even the king’s son-in-law, who is captain over your guard, and is honored in your house? “Did I just begin to inquire of God for him today? Far be it from me! Do not let the king impute anything to his servant or to any of the household of my father, for your servant knows nothing at all of this whole affair.” But the king said, “You shall surely die, Ahimelech, you and all your father’s household!” And the king said to the guards who were attending him, “Turn around and put the priests of the LORD to death, because their hand also is with David and because they knew that he was fleeing and did not reveal it to me.” But the servants of the king were not willing to put forth their hands to attack the priests of the LORD. Then the king said to Doeg, “You turn around and attack the priests.” And Doeg the Edomite turned around and attacked the priests, and he killed that day eighty-five men who wore the linen ephod. And he struck Nob the city of the priests with the edge of the sword, both men and women, children and infants; also oxen, donkeys, and sheep he struck with the edge of the sword. But one son of Ahimelech the son of Ahitub, named Abiathar, escaped and fled after David. Abiathar told David that Saul had killed the priests of the LORD. Then David said to Abiathar, “I knew on that day, when Doeg the Edomite was there, that he would surely tell Saul. I have brought about the death of every person in your father’s household. “Stay with me; do not be afraid, for he who seeks my life seeks your life, for you are safe with me.”
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